Spirit of the Stairway

Is your hair naturally fluffy?

Sat, 18 May 2013 21:52:26 -0400

Well…yeah I guess so.

Thank you?

There Were Stars

Mon, 13 May 2013 21:01:46 -0400

eligolds-worthy:

Eli felt a sense of pride fill him as he so confidently assured her that things would be fine. It seemed as though it had only been days ago when he’d shown up at her house, disheveled and broken, terrified for what the future would hold for the two of them. He breathed easy, the gentle music and cool spring breeze putting him in a trance, not to mention the love of his life curled up next to him, reminding him with every breath that she was the best thing in his life. “No, I have to say we’ve come a long way, Edwards.” He responded softly, a sad chuckle falling from his lips at her final phrase. “I’m afraid when it comes to us…things are very rarely fair.” Eli explained, though a smile spread across his lips. “-But I think that’s what makes us so incredible. Have you ever met another couple that’s gone through even half of what we have?” He asked, a slight teasing tone in his voice as he thought back to what their first relationship had been like. “It’s never perfect, we’ve never been lucky, and things don’t usually go our way, but I think that’s what makes us so amazing. We’ve been knocked down so many times, it’s like being with you…makes up for it all.” His words slowly began to trail off as he spoke, and he was suddenly very glad that he’d opted for an outside date. A thought popped into his head, one he often explored, but had never been courageous enough to share. He glanced down at her, and his lips twitched into a small smile. With a shaking breath and his fingers effortlessly toying with her auburn curls, Eli realized that this was something he never wanted to let go of, this moment, this love. It was something that could never be broken, and they’d have to be careful to make sure it stayed that way. “Would it make you uncomfortable if I told you that I want to spend the rest of my life with you?”

Sucking in a deep breath as his question filled the air between them Clare was thankful that her head was laying on his chest and he couldn’t see the darkening blush that was creeping up her cheeks. Replaying his question over and over in her mind like a broken record she picked apart each of his words overanalyzing and dissecting them looking for someway to distract her from the thoughts that were tumbling through her mind. It wasn’t that his question had made her uncomfortable because it hadn’t. She’d be lying if she said she had never thought about the possibility of them getting married long after they both finished college and had steady jobs, but daydreaming about that and having an actual conversation about spending the rest of their lives together were two very different things. “No,” she settled on after a few minutes of silence. “It wouldn’t make me uncomfortable.” Clare wondered how much courage it had taken him to ask her a question like that. Somehow laying under the stars with her head on his chest and his fingers combing through her hair it was easier to admit the things that they were otherwise too shy and embarrassed to admit out loud. Like the thoughts they each held about their future and growing old together. With his confession out in the open Clare only thought it was fair to admit something that had been running through her own mind during their brief discussions of the future. “S-sometimes when I can’t sleep I think about… about us and our future and the possibility of spending the rest of our lives together,” she blurted out the confession making her already red cheeks darken. Thankful for their position and the darkness that surrounded them she was grateful that he couldn’t see the way that her words were making her react. “That probably sounded silly though. I guess what I’m trying to say is the more that I think about the end of summer and the thought of you leaving the more real it becomes. I think we both know this long distance relationship is going to be hard, but thinking about it makes me realize how much I want to spend the rest of my life with you. I don’t want to end up like my parents and I know you’re going to tell me that we’re nothing like them, but they were young and in love too and they got married and had kids and things didn’t work out for them and I’m worried that it won’t work out for us either,” she mumbled. As the words left her mouth she realized just how crazy she must have sounded in the quiet night. While her parents divorce had happened a long time ago it still stung thinking about it. All of her life she had been taught that divorce was wrong and to see her parents marriage crumble right before her eyes was something that she worried she’d never fully get over. It didn’t help that her contact with her dad had all but stopped since then only making her more confused and hurt. While a small, rational part of her knew that they weren’t anything like her parents ending up like they had was a still a fear that dwelled in the back of her mind no matter how many times Eli reassured her otherwise. “I’m probably not making any sense right now am I?” she asked as she curled her body closer against his own.

He let out a breath at her simple response, a smile curling onto his lips at the mere thought of being this happy with another person for the rest of his life, it seemed almost unfair. It warmed his heart to think that during her restless nights, her thoughts could drift to him, and their relationship, that she could think of their happiness and find enough peace to whisk herself into a gentle sleep. He remembered their countless arguments when he’d attempted to convince Clare that they were not her parents, and they would never be, but no matter how often he repeated the mantra, it never seemed to stick. He chuckled a bit as she moved in closer, shaking his head in response to her question. “It makes sense that you feel that way, but we’re nothing like them, we truly aren’t.” Eli explained, wondering if there would ever be a day that she’d accept the way that things turned out, wondering if she’d ever truly move on, but the better part of him opted not to ask, in fear of hurting her feelings or having her believe that he was insensitive to the situation. “I know that what happened was hard on you, and I know that it still is, but realistically, we’re nothing like your parents. Sure, they were young, but there are tons of young couples out there that do stay together. I think we could be one of them.” His voice was soft, not a hint of bitterness in his tone. “I’m never going to do to you what your dad did to your mom, okay?” He added, moving his hand to her shoulder and giving it a gentle squeeze. He moved from beneath her, quickly letting his body hover over hers so that his arms held him up on either side of her head, laughing softly as he did so. “I’ll love you forever, Clare Edwards. That is a guarantee.” He whispered, their faces close. Leaning in, he let his lips graze hers, their breath mixing before he finally pressed his against her own in a gentle manner, his eyes fluttering shut at the sheer bliss of it all. Just like all of their kisses, he saw sparks, his body practically went numb from the intoxicating feeling and he was tempted to never break apart, but he did, and as he did so a smile spread widely across his lips, like a child who’d just won a game. “Should I be getting you home?” Eli asked regretfully, their lips still brushing one another’s.

why do you love clare?

Mon, 13 May 2013 19:57:47 -0400

Bit of a heavy question.

I love her because of all the things that make her who she is. I love her intelligence and her compassion, I love her strength and her way with words. I love Clare Edwards because she was there when I thought everything was crumbling beneath me, because she believes in me and I believe in her. Because she’s beautiful, and talented, humble and a bit of a dork, but I couldn’t imagine myself with anyone else.

It’s difficult to explain, I suppose, but I guess you could say, in the simplest of terms, I just do.

aren't you a bit young to be in love or to be thinking about spending the rest of your life with someone?

Mon, 13 May 2013 07:48:25 -0400

Probably, but I didn’t really plan any of this. It just happened.

how much do you love clare

Sun, 12 May 2013 21:23:09 -0400

More than words could every express.

There Were Stars

Sun, 12 May 2013 21:22:14 -0400

misfit-clare:

eligolds-worthy:

As his fingers wove through her hair, Eli remembered the time he spent next to her, curled up in her bed, pink sheets covering their bodies as he threaded his fingers through her hair in the same manner, using every technique he could think of to get her to fall asleep when she’d been having so much trouble. He smiled out of pride when she’d mentioned that she liked it, her voice soft, almost tired, and he couldn’t help but laugh a bit as he wondered if it was because of what he was doing. Eli rolled his eyes at her question, wondering why she always doubted herself, as if he’d run away. “Incredibly weird, Clare.” He teased, keeping his tone low. “I like listening to you talk, too.” His heart sunk at her next set of words, and though he couldn’t wait for the endless possibilities NYU would provide him with, he had really began dreading the end of their time together. He knew that it would come to an end, and when things were all said and done, they’d be together again, but still, imagining going an entire year without her made his body ache, knowing that it would not have the pleasure of being curled up next to hers. “I’ll miss you. I’ll miss everything about you. The way you talk, the way you curl your hair, the smell of your perfume, holding your hand…everything.” Eli admit to her softly, though it wasn’t much of a confession, for these were things he’d said before, though maybe he’d said them differently. “-But when everything is done, all of those little things we missed so much will seem even better.”

Eli was right, Clare knew that he was right, but it did little to stop the aching pain in her chest as she thought of their time apart that was quickly approaching no matter how the two tried to deny it. “They say that… distance does make the heart grow fonder,” she whispered finding little comfort in the often heard quote. It was hard to imagine a year without him. A year without laying next to his side like this basking in the comfortable silence that often fell over them, a year without holding his hand, going out on dates, seeing each other in the hallway at school, lying to her parents as they planned sleep overs. A year without that and so much more. The thought left a bitter taste in her mouth and as hard as she tried to take back her words and forget about this conversation she was the one who had brought it up in the first place. Moving her head back down to his chest she felt the need to reassure both of them again that they’d be okay, that they’d get through this and while it would no doubt be difficult handling a long distance relationship they had been through so much more than that. But as his fingers continued to weave through her hair gently untangling her curls and as her eyes fluttered closed again she realized she didn’t have to reassure him of their future or the state of their relationship for they both already knew, had already committed, vowed to make them work this time no matter what and a little distance wasn’t about to change that. His words tugged her lips up into a reluctant smile and she hummed in agreement. “You’re right, when we do finally see each other again we’ll appreciate the little things and each other so much more. Did you ever imagine after we first met we’d up like this? Laying together under the stars in your backyard talking about sleep overs and rock concerts? I don’t know… sometimes it’s just hard to believe everything we’ve been through and it seems like now that we’re closer than ever we’re going to have to be saying goodbye to each other again for a year… in a way it doesn’t seem fair.”

Eli felt a sense of pride fill him as he so confidently assured her that things would be fine. It seemed as though it had only been days ago when he’d shown up at her house, disheveled and broken, terrified for what the future would hold for the two of them. He breathed easy, the gentle music and cool spring breeze putting him in a trance, not to mention the love of his life curled up next to him, reminding him with every breath that she was the best thing in his life. “No, I have to say we’ve come a long way, Edwards.” He responded softly, a sad chuckle falling from his lips at her final phrase. “I’m afraid when it comes to us…things are very rarely fair.” Eli explained, though a smile spread across his lips. “-But I think that’s what makes us so incredible. Have you ever met another couple that’s gone through even half of what we have?” He asked, a slight teasing tone in his voice as he thought back to what their first relationship had been like. “It’s never perfect, we’ve never been lucky, and things don’t usually go our way, but I think that’s what makes us so amazing. We’ve been knocked down so many times, it’s like being with you…makes up for it all.” His words slowly began to trail off as he spoke, and he was suddenly very glad that he’d opted for an outside date. A thought popped into his head, one he often explored, but had never been courageous enough to share. He glanced down at her, and his lips twitched into a small smile. With a shaking breath and his fingers effortlessly toying with her auburn curls, Eli realized that this was something he never wanted to let go of, this moment, this love. It was something that could never be broken, and they’d have to be careful to make sure it stayed that way. “Would it make you uncomfortable if I told you that I want to spend the rest of my life with you?”

How long have you know you ready to sleep with Clare? Do you still think she's going to wait until marriage?

Thu, 09 May 2013 20:15:02 -0400

I-I don’t know…I didn’t mark it on a calendar or anything, I just fell in love with her.

Again, don’t know, but if it comes to that, I will gladly wait.

There Were Stars

Thu, 09 May 2013 20:13:58 -0400

misfit-clare:

eligolds-worthy:

Eli hummed in agreement, not quite finding the will to let his voice soil the sound of hers. How soft and angelic it was to him, how she could say anything and he’d be stuck in a trance. Listening to her proposition, Eli smiled as he nodded, thinking of how nice it would be to have there own mini-camping trip in his backyard. His eyes opened quickly at her nervous rambling about prom, and he couldn’t help but grin at her stuttered words and squeaky voice. “I think that sounds like a perfect idea.” He responded calmly, opting not to torture her for her nervous antics, considering he’d been in the same place when they first began their date. Though he’d been in the same boat, Eli still found it strange that Clare felt so nervous to ask about sleeping over. They’d done it before, stayed with one another over night. There hadn’t been any pressure, and the two had remained perfectly respectful as they laid side next to one another, only going so far as to wrap their arms around the other, pulling them into a loving embrace that neither would remember doing when they awoke. Running his fingers through her hair, Eli glanced at their bodies, how perfectly molded together they were. “You look beautiful.” He reminded her, keeping his voice soft. “I was reading something the other day that I think you’d like…” He began, softly beginning to describe the plot and the author’s background. “Something about , ‘if we want to leave our wound,to separate, it makes a new knot for us and condemns us to drain our blood and burn together’.” Eli told her from memory, knowing that at this point he must have just been rambling, but he couldn’t seem to stop once he’d started. One of his favorite things about the two of them was the way they had so many things in common, yet contrasted so drastically. Twirling a curl between his fingertips, he finished, letting out a gentle sigh as he did so.

Clare exhaled slowly as his calm voice filled her ears agreeing to her idea about prom. The nerves that had been flowing through her body still lingered as she imagined him picking her up for prom and instead of dreading a curfew that would cut their night short like it so often did during their dates she pictured them spending all of prom together before coming back to his house and falling asleep wrapped up in one another’s arms. It was a sweet image that filled her mind though it only served to make her wish they could do exactly that tonight. His gentle voice flowed through her ears as he recited something he had stumbled across while thinking of her. His fingers curled around her wavy locks as his once strong voice trailed off, his words coming to an end. “You’re right… I do like that,” she murmured sleepily. Something about the gentle way he wove his fingers in and out of her hair and the way that his voice settled over her like a blanket on a chilly night always made her relax, and often times she felt like he was the only thing that could get her to relax like this. “Would it sound weird if I said I like listening to you talk?” she murmured picking at a loose thread on the blanket. Laughing quietly at the strangeness of her words she wracked her brain trying to clarify what she meant. Coming up short on words in her comfortable and relaxed state she shrugged her shoulders helplessly seemingly giving up on trying to explain or at least make any kind of sense tonight. “Your voice… it’s calming and I like when you recite things you’ve memorized to me. I guess… I guess this is one of the things I’m going to miss most. Listening to you talk and laying here like this. I know we’ll still talk on the phone, but I don’t think the phone does your voice justice which sounds weird and I suppose I’m rambling again,” she finished her words coming out rushed. A feeling of guilt settled in the pit of her stomach for bringing up his eventual leaving at the end of summer. Worry that she had somehow ruined their otherwise perfect date left her with an unsettling feeling, one that she couldn’t seem to shake no matter how hard she tried. Searching for someway to distract him of her thoughts she lifted her head from his chest before settling it on his shoulder. Glancing up into his darkened eyes, one she could almost make out in the dim setting she shrugged her shoulders again before speaking up so softly she was almost afraid he wouldn’t hear her, “I’m just going to miss you… and this.”

As his fingers wove through her hair, Eli remembered the time he spent next to her, curled up in her bed, pink sheets covering their bodies as he threaded his fingers through her hair in the same manner, using every technique he could think of to get her to fall asleep when she’d been having so much trouble. He smiled out of pride when she’d mentioned that she liked it, her voice soft, almost tired, and he couldn’t help but laugh a bit as he wondered if it was because of what he was doing. Eli rolled his eyes at her question, wondering why she always doubted herself, as if he’d run away. “Incredibly weird, Clare.” He teased, keeping his tone low. “I like listening to you talk, too.” His heart sunk at her next set of words, and though he couldn’t wait for the endless possibilities NYU would provide him with, he had really began dreading the end of their time together. He knew that it would come to an end, and when things were all said and done, they’d be together again, but still, imagining going an entire year without her made his body ache, knowing that it would not have the pleasure of being curled up next to hers. “I’ll miss you. I’ll miss everything about you. The way you talk, the way you curl your hair, the smell of your perfume, holding your hand…everything.” Eli admit to her softly, though it wasn’t much of a confession, for these were things he’d said before, though maybe he’d said them differently. “-But when everything is done, all of those little things we missed so much will seem even better.”

There Were Stars

Wed, 08 May 2013 01:33:00 -0400

misfit-clare:

eligolds-worthy:

Eli smiled gently to himself as she adjusted closer to him. Her head resting carefully on his chest. It was a warm night, and the sky was scattered with stars, a perfect night to lay out, just the two of them. To let the drama be whisked away, and be themselves with one another, no pain, no bad memories. Just the two of them. He moved a hand to her perfectly curled auburn waves, running his finger through her soft hair, his eyes slowly fluttering shut at the calming feeling that settled over him. He could hear her every subtle breath as she remained close to him, serving as a beautiful reminder that she was there, she wasn’t going anywhere, and she’d be right beside him for a very long time. He wanted to fill the silence with something beautiful and poetic, something to tell her how much he needed her, how he felt like there was nothing else in the world that mattered but her happiness, to see that smile light up on that gorgeous face of hers. His content smile twisted into something of a boyish smirk, feeling himself becoming lost in the simple sound of her voice, those three words making him feel as though he could do anything. “Thank you, I’m rather fond of you as well.” Eli whispered in the same tone, a soft chuckle following before he clarified. “I love you, more than anything.”

Clare couldn’t help but to roll her eyes at Eli’s words, biting back a teasing remark about how she hoped he would be fond of her after all this time. Choosing to stay silent instead she enjoyed the way his gentle I love you rolled off of his lips. To her there was no better sound than hearing those simple words and even after all this time it still never failed to make her heart speed up beneath her chest and her breath to hitch in the back of her throat. “I can’t get over how quiet and peaceful it is. It almost makes you want spend the night out here sleeping under the stars,” she commented her voice soft gentle. Before she could stop herself or think about what the words that were tumbling through her mind she was speaking up again, blurting the words out without giving too much thought or worry to what was being said. “I think we should do exactly that. Stay out here all night sometime this summer I mean. Obviously we can’t tonight because my parents know I’m with you and with prom coming up and the concert that’s probably too many sleep overs so close together and there’s only so many times I can tell my parents I’m spending the night with Alli and Jenna. A-assuming I’m spending the night at your house after… after prom that is,” she whispered suddenly feeling shy and a bit nervous, though she couldn’t understand why. Aside from his prom proposal earlier in the evening they hadn’t had a chance to discuss their plans for the night and with it still being a few weeks away she was almost afraid her bold assumption she would be spending the night at his house afterwards was too much. Too late to take back the words that had already tumbled from her pink lips she stayed silent half wishing the ground would open up and swallow her so she wouldn’t have to wait in agony for the sound of his voice to break through her over analyzing mind.

Eli hummed in agreement, not quite finding the will to let his voice soil the sound of hers. How soft and angelic it was to him, how she could say anything and he’d be stuck in a trance. Listening to her proposition, Eli smiled as he nodded, thinking of how nice it would be to have there own mini-camping trip in his backyard. His eyes opened quickly at her nervous rambling about prom, and he couldn’t help but grin at her stuttered words and squeaky voice. “I think that sounds like a perfect idea.” He responded calmly, opting not to torture her for her nervous antics, considering he’d been in the same place when they first began their date. Though he’d been in the same boat, Eli still found it strange that Clare felt so nervous to ask about sleeping over. They’d done it before, stayed with one another over night. There hadn’t been any pressure, and the two had remained perfectly respectful as they laid side next to one another, only going so far as to wrap their arms around the other, pulling them into a loving embrace that neither would remember doing when they awoke. Running his fingers through her hair, Eli glanced at their bodies, how perfectly molded together they were. “You look beautiful.” He reminded her, keeping his voice soft. “I was reading something the other day that I think you’d like…” He began, softly beginning to describe the plot and the author’s background. “Something about , ‘if we want to leave our wound,to separate, it makes a new knot for us and condemns us to drain our blood and burn together’.” Eli told her from memory, knowing that at this point he must have just been rambling, but he couldn’t seem to stop once he’d started. One of his favorite things about the two of them was the way they had so many things in common, yet contrasted so drastically. Twirling a curl between his fingertips, he finished, letting out a gentle sigh as he did so.

There Were Stars

Tue, 07 May 2013 22:18:46 -0400

misfit-clare:

eligolds-worthy:

Her shriek of approval made him jump, and he could barely contain his excited grin at her reaction. Unlike him, Clare had never been to a concert. She’d never gotten the real ‘live show’ experience, and he was absolutely determined to make it incredible for her. The show was after prom, thankfully, so they’d have a couple weeks in between to avoid any kind of conflict. Though Eli wished that Clare’s parents were as easy going as his, he knew that convincing them to let her go to a concert would be difficult. Especially since it would be with him. Hearing her reassuring words lifted a weight off of his shoulders and he couldn’t be any happier that he was with someone who knew him so well. “It’s not weird, it isn’t.” He nodded, deciding to put the destructive thoughts behind him, to think about what’s happening now, as opposed to what’s happened before. Eli scoffed gently at her word choice. “Hesitant? More like persistent. I paid for them but he wasn’t exactly keen on giving me access to the tickets before they’re for sale to the public.” He explained, his eyes widening a bit as she continued, not ever expecting her to get this excited, but he surely couldn’t complain. Eli leaned on one elbow, placing their tickets securely in his back pocket, his body turned to face hers. Leaning forward, he pressed his lips against hers in a gentle manner. Eli smiled as he pulled away from their quick kiss, and laid back down right next to her, a grin plastered on his face.

Clare pursed her lips to the side not thrilled with the information that he had paid for her concert ticket. With her limited concert knowledge she imagined that the tickets weren’t cheap to come by and while she appreciated that his dad had broken down and given them the tickets before they were on sale she still felt guilty that he had paid for her own. While his surprise about the concert tickets made their date even more memorable she had a hard time resisting the urge to ask him how much she owed him. Without ever voicing her concerned thoughts she could almost see his reaction already, the scoff of disbelief that would surely fall from his lips at her suggestion, the stubbornness each of them would take as they playfully argued back and forth over her words. Deciding against speaking up tonight and ruining their perfect date she made a mental note to ask him about it later. “In that case remind me to thank both of your parents for making this evening so amazing,” she settled on as her voice broke through the gentle calm that had fallen over them after her outburst of excitement. Clare’s lips curled up into a soft smile as she felt his own move against her own in a gentle manner. The kiss was simple and sweet, much like their date had been. With sparkling eyes she watched as he resumed his previous position of laying back down against the soft blankets. Waiting until he was comfortable and situated Clare inched her body towards his curling into his side as she moved to rest her head on his chest. The rhythmic sound of his heartbeat hummed in her ears and the younger girl let out a content sigh at their current position. Letting her eyes drift shut she imagined spending the rest of their night like this with her curled up against his side staring up at the stars and taking comfort in one another’s presence. She of course knew this could never happen staying the night at his house like this was out of the question considering her parents she knew she was going out with Eli tonight, but for a few precious minutes she allowed herself to get lost in just that fantasy of never having to move from this spot again. “I love you, Eli,” she murmured quietly so afraid of speaking too loudly and disturbing the calm night.

Eli smiled gently to himself as she adjusted closer to him. Her head resting carefully on his chest. It was a warm night, and the sky was scattered with stars, a perfect night to lay out, just the two of them. To let the drama be whisked away, and be themselves with one another, no pain, no bad memories. Just the two of them. He moved a hand to her perfectly curled auburn waves, running his finger through her soft hair, his eyes slowly fluttering shut at the calming feeling that settled over him. He could hear her every subtle breath as she remained close to him, serving as a beautiful reminder that she was there, she wasn’t going anywhere, and she’d be right beside him for a very long time. He wanted to fill the silence with something beautiful and poetic, something to tell her how much he needed her, how he felt like there was nothing else in the world that mattered but her happiness, to see that smile light up on that gorgeous face of hers. His content smile twisted into something of a boyish smirk, feeling himself becoming lost in the simple sound of her voice, those three words making him feel as though he could do anything. “Thank you, I’m rather fond of you as well.” Eli whispered in the same tone, a soft chuckle following before he clarified. “I love you, more than anything.”

Photo

Tue, 07 May 2013 21:20:27 -0400

TMI TUESDAY BABY BOY forgetting about Clare and her stupid vow are you ready to have sex with her?

Tue, 07 May 2013 21:20:14 -0400

~~Well…I love her…I’m ready for whatever she’s ready for.~~

I am in love with Clare.

Tue, 07 May 2013 21:19:42 -0400

Me too.

There Were Stars

Tue, 07 May 2013 00:28:07 -0400

misfit-clare:

eligolds-worthy:

Eli felt his heart stop for a moment as she looked back at him, his intense gaze holding strong as he thought of just the right way to word his next statement. “I think they’re might have been…one more thing I packed.” He explained, slowly unraveling his hand from hers and turning to reach into the basket, presenting two small pieces of paper in between his fingertips. “I did a little research, and a whole lot of grovelling, but…here they are.” He explained, turning them around to reveal their two tickets for the Arcade Fire concert. He was anxious about this, making this promise. Making these plans terrified him to no end, for the last time he did, he ended up losing it and being strapped to a hospital bed. “I promised you a concert, did I not?” He stammered out, his eyes holding hope, and a small bit of worry that she may turn him down. “I-it’s on a Friday, and it runs pretty late, so I thought…if you want to…you could maybe…stay here?” Eli struggled to keep his eyes on hers, worried that if he caught a glimpse of her expression, he’d see how worried she was about the entire ordeal. “But there’s no pressure.” He added quickly, swallowing the lump in his throat as he waited for an answer, a response, a blink, anything to give him some sort of clarity.

“You did not!” Clare shouted gleefully with just a bit too much volume for their otherwise peaceful date. The excitement that laced through her words was quickly shot down as she caught a glimpse of the nervousness that flashed across his eyes. Without him ever saying a word she knew exactly what he was thinking of for she had the same lingering thought. The last time he had made plans for the two of them things didn’t go so well, but this was different. He was better, they were better and those were the thoughts Clare vowed to focus on instead of the past. His offer that she stay at his house over night sent a nervous thrill through her body, one she couldn’t pin point the cause of. It wasn’t the first time she had spent the night at his house and she could almost guarantee it wouldn’t be the last, but something about the gentle way he suggested it, almost as if he were afraid of pushing her too far caused her to be a bit more hesitant with her reply. “O-Okay, yeah I think that could work. Obviously I’d have to have a cover story seeing as how I don’t think my mom would approve of my going to a concert with you and spending the night at your house, but… I’d like to.” Reluctant to bring up their past and the last trip he had planned Clare couldn’t help feeling like the only way the two teens could officially move on with their future plans and get rid of the dark cloud that seemingly hung over their head was to at least acknowledge what they were both thinking but refused to bring up. Clearing her throat she let out a shaky breath trying to gather her thoughts as best she could given the current topic. “I know we’re both thinking it… or at least thought about it, but this isn’t anything like… last time. It’s… it’s completely different and there’s no reason why this should be so weird, right?” she asked with a simple nod of her head. Before giving him a chance to reply she was talking again changing the subject to what she hoped wouldn’t be as awkward as their last topic. “I take it your dad was… hesitant to give these to you? A-assuming that’s who you got the tickets from. I still can’t believe we’re actually going to see Arcade Fire, Eli! God this is amazing!”

Her shriek of approval made him jump, and he could barely contain his excited grin at her reaction. Unlike him, Clare had never been to a concert. She’d never gotten the real ‘live show’ experience, and he was absolutely determined to make it incredible for her. The show was after prom, thankfully, so they’d have a couple weeks in between to avoid any kind of conflict. Though Eli wished that Clare’s parents were as easy going as his, he knew that convincing them to let her go to a concert would be difficult. Especially since it would be with him. Hearing her reassuring words lifted a weight off of his shoulders and he couldn’t be any happier that he was with someone who knew him so well. “It’s not weird, it isn’t.” He nodded, deciding to put the destructive thoughts behind him, to think about what’s happening now, as opposed to what’s happened before. Eli scoffed gently at her word choice. “Hesitant? More like persistent. I paid for them but he wasn’t exactly keen on giving me access to the tickets before they’re for sale to the public.” He explained, his eyes widening a bit as she continued, not ever expecting her to get this excited, but he surely couldn’t complain. Eli leaned on one elbow, placing their tickets securely in his back pocket, his body turned to face hers. Leaning forward, he pressed his lips against hers in a gentle manner. Eli smiled as he pulled away from their quick kiss, and laid back down right next to her, a grin plastered on his face.

There Were Stars

Mon, 06 May 2013 21:47:36 -0400

misfit-clare:

eligolds-worthy:

Staring off into nothing in particular, a smile curled onto his lips for only a moment as he noticed Clare moving to lay down, not uttering a single word as she took her rightful place right next to him. He thought, as he looked at the dozens of tiny stars plastered along the darkened sky. He thought of their first date, their first kiss. He thought of the moments they’d spend together right before he left for New York, and how they’d be able to work it out when he was gone. He thought of every fight and makeup, every joke, every confession, and by the time he couldn’t possibly think of anything more, he heard her voice and was broken from his trance. Turning his head slightly, he watched her as she spoke, agreeing silently with her statement ,when he noticed that she would continue. He gave her a sympathetic look as she spoke of Darcy, not even being able to imagine how badly it hurt her. To watch her family divide, to see her sister leave the only home she knew. He took her hand in his own as she spoke, locking their fingers together in his own form of a response. “Funny you should ask, actually.” Eli began softly, clearing his throat before he began to speak. “Bullfrog and I used to sit in the backyard and when he caught me looking at the stars, he started telling me all this stuff about the constellations and their names.” He laughed at the fond memory, shaking his head a bit. “I guess I should have assumed that ‘Led Zeppelin’ was not the name of a constellation, but it was fun to think that it was.” He explained further, bringing their locked hands closer to him, using his other to gently trace along the lines on her skin. He smiled to himself as he thought, glancing at the picnic basket right beside them. “Clare?” He started, locking his gaze with her own. “There’s something I forgot.”

Clare wasn’t sure what she had been expecting with Eli’s answer, but somehow it wasn’t that. Listening to him tell stories about when he was a kid was always a favorite pastime of hers and this one was no exception. It was hard for her to imagine him sitting in the backyard as a child with his dad looking up at the same stars she and Darcy had looked at and she wasn’t sure why. Maybe it was because she had a hard time picturing him as a child, innocent and carefree before the loss of his first girlfriend and the rocky start he had endured at Degrassi with Fitz. It was hard to think back to just a few years ago when she herself had been innocent and naive starting Degrassi at her grade nine year. Thinking of all the changes they had gone through in the course of a few years and thinking of all the changes each of them would face in the next year with his heading off to NYU and her staying made her chest ache with sadness and she feared these would be lingering thoughts she’d carry with her until the end of summer. “Hm?” Clare hummed in response to her name falling so effortlessly from his plump lips. Her mind was still stuck on his story about the constellations and his dad telling them they were named Led Zeppelin she didn’t catch his eyes darting to the picnic basket beside them his voice the only thing to draw her attention away from the starry night sky above them. Tilting her head to the side she caught his intense gaze causing her heart to speed up beneath her chest. Her eyebrows crinkled together as she searched his eyes looking for something that would clue her in to what it was that he could have possibly forgotten. Their date and his surprise had been perfect and more than she could have imagined so it was difficult for her to think of something that he could have possibly forgotten. “What’d you forget?”

Eli felt his heart stop for a moment as she looked back at him, his intense gaze holding strong as he thought of just the right way to word his next statement. “I think they’re might have been…one more thing I packed.” He explained, slowly unraveling his hand from hers and turning to reach into the basket, presenting two small pieces of paper in between his fingertips. “I did a little research, and a whole lot of grovelling, but…here they are.” He explained, turning them around to reveal their two tickets for the Arcade Fire concert. He was anxious about this, making this promise. Making these plans terrified him to no end, for the last time he did, he ended up losing it and being strapped to a hospital bed. “I promised you a concert, did I not?” He stammered out, his eyes holding hope, and a small bit of worry that she may turn him down. “I-it’s on a Friday, and it runs pretty late, so I thought…if you want to…you could maybe…stay here?” Eli struggled to keep his eyes on hers, worried that if he caught a glimpse of her expression, he’d see how worried she was about the entire ordeal. “But there’s no pressure.” He added quickly, swallowing the lump in his throat as he waited for an answer, a response, a blink, anything to give him some sort of clarity.

keeps it civil? does that mean your jealous he almost slept with clare bear?

Mon, 06 May 2013 21:45:15 -0400

Well I’m certainly don’t like the thought of it.

Do you ever look at Jake and think to yourself pretty good lookin dude and find yourself overcome with jealousy cause he almost slept with your girlfriend?

Mon, 06 May 2013 19:32:24 -0400

On the rare occasion that I do look at Jake, I try not to think about anything he and Clare might have done when they were together.

Keeps it civil.

There Were Stars

Mon, 06 May 2013 19:30:41 -0400

misfit-clare:

eligolds-worthy:

He smirked with pride at her comment, scooting a bit closer to her. “Oh?” Eli challenged, happy that he could impress her, even happier that she was admitting it. Remembering their last date that wasn’t one that involved homework sent a chill down his back, suddenly recalling their little session in the back of his dads car after an unexpected storm passed through, that was a day he’d probably never forget. He never wanted to. He swallowed the lump in his throat as he watched her bring the brownie to her lips, laughing a bit at her next set of words. “I’ll be sure to relay that message to Cece.” He assured, taking one for himself. He held a hand under his chin as he ate, catching crumbs as they fell and let his eyes meet hers again when she spoke, causing him to shake his head side to side, unable to speak with his mouth full. “They went out with a few of their friends, and Bullfrog left me with the car. It was a just a distraction, mostly. Considering we could have walked, but I didn’t want you guessing where we were going.” He explained further, shrugging his shoulders, finding it kind of excessive as he looked back on it, though it wasn’t like he could help him self. Once he had something in mind, he found it difficult to shake it, no matter how ridiculous. “I thought maybe a restaurant would suffice, but I figured you’d be expecting it.” Going on, Eli reached over to the seemingly empty basket, Eli shut the lid, and moved it behind him, outstretching his legs as he leaned back on his elbows. Gesturing for her to join him, he looked upward, seeing stars fill the dark sky, though their little spot was illuminated by the twinkling lights. Getting more comfortable, he moved his arms over his stomach, laying flat on his back, humming softly to the song in the background.

“Well I’m glad your dad left you the car. Somehow I don’t think walking through the neighborhood with me blindfolded would have gone over well with the neighbors,” she laughed. Getting out of his car as he lead her to the backyard blindfolded had been tricky enough and she couldn’t have imagined leaving her house and walking through the streets in between their houses like that. His comment about taking her to a restaurant sounded nice, but somehow having a picnic in his backyard with just the two of them sounded like a much better idea and she was thrilled he had gone through with it. With spring now in full swing it was finally getting nice enough out that the two of them could spend more time outside going on urban adventures and taking their time walking places. The stars were just beginning to peak through the darkened sky and even with the twinkly lights illuminating a small patch of his backyard she found it difficult to see more than a few feet in front of her. Following his lead she leaned back against the blanket lying comfortably on her back as her eyes took in the night sky above her. Aside from the soothing sounds of Arcade Fire drifting out from the speakers and their gentle breathing mixing together it was unusually quiet, not that Clare was complaining. Breaking the silence she turned her head sideways taking his appearance in through the dimmed lighting. The way that his chest rose and fell peacefully reminded her of the way he always looked so at ease when he slept, as if he didn’t have a care in the world or any place to be other than right here with her enjoying the stars and their date. “It’s so peaceful out here,” she murmured breaking the silence that had fallen over them. “When I was a kid Darcy and I used to spend hours outside in the summer catching fireflies and looking at the stars. After she left and things got more complicated with my family I stopped going outside to look at the stars, but this… I guess laying out here with you reminded me of how peaceful it used to be. It’s so easy to get lost in your thoughts out here and forget about all of the bad stuff going on for a while,” she reminisced. “What about you? Did you ever do this when you were younger? Or were you too busy attending rock concerts with your parents?”

Staring off into nothing in particular, a smile curled onto his lips for only a moment as he noticed Clare moving to lay down, not uttering a single word as she took her rightful place right next to him. He thought, as he looked at the dozens of tiny stars plastered along the darkened sky. He thought of their first date, their first kiss. He thought of the moments they’d spend together right before he left for New York, and how they’d be able to work it out when he was gone. He thought of every fight and makeup, every joke, every confession, and by the time he couldn’t possibly think of anything more, he heard her voice and was broken from his trance. Turning his head slightly, he watched her as she spoke, agreeing silently with her statement ,when he noticed that she would continue. He gave her a sympathetic look as she spoke of Darcy, not even being able to imagine how badly it hurt her. To watch her family divide, to see her sister leave the only home she knew. He took her hand in his own as she spoke, locking their fingers together in his own form of a response. “Funny you should ask, actually.” Eli began softly, clearing his throat before he began to speak. “Bullfrog and I used to sit in the backyard and when he caught me looking at the stars, he started telling me all this stuff about the constellations and their names.” He laughed at the fond memory, shaking his head a bit. “I guess I should have assumed that ‘Led Zeppelin’ was not the name of a constellation, but it was fun to think that it was.” He explained further, bringing their locked hands closer to him, using his other to gently trace along the lines on her skin. He smiled to himself as he thought, glancing at the picnic basket right beside them. “Clare?” He started, locking his gaze with her own. “There’s something I forgot.”

There Were Stars

Mon, 06 May 2013 13:01:43 -0400

misfit-clare:

eligolds-worthy:

Eli couldn’t help but laugh a little at her next set of words, knowing all too well that if Clare had presented her mother with the idea of ‘date planning’ together, she’d be less than thrilled to do so. Looking over to the basket he’d prepared for the two of them, Eli feigned a look of hurt, holding a hand over his mock-wounded chest. “Clare, you insult me.” He pushed, reaching over to lift the top of the basket. Pulling out a bottle of sparkling cider, he set it aside, reaching in further as he spoke. “You will be bewildered to know that I did actually have some part in these creations this time.” Eli informed her, revealing a plate of simple finger sandwiches covered in plastic wrap. “Cece didn’t trust me with anything hot or sharp.” He laughed, removing the wrap before reaching into the basket again. “We also have chocolate covered strawberries and brownies, which, fortunately for everyone, I was not apart of.” Eli chuckled, taking one of his sandwiches for himself. He took a bite, nodding in approval at his own simple job well done, quickly finishing up and leaving a satisfied look on his face. He reached over to the bottle of sparkling cider he had set aside and poured each of them a glass, holding up his own as he waited for her to do the same. “To us, and Cece, for being wise enough to not let me cook.” He laughed, clinking his glass against hers before taking a small sip.

“Hm somehow I don’t think licking out the bowl of brownie mix counts as helping,” she teased. Her mouth watered with hunger as she watched him take out each item from the basket setting it down carefully on the blanket in front of them. Her eyes immediately darted towards the brownies and chocolate covered strawberries that seemed to be calling her name. Her weakness had always been desserts, but before she had time to try one of Cece’s delicious homemade brownies Eli was pouring the sparkling cider. Taking the glass from his outstretched hand she couldn’t help smiling at his rather cheesy albeit adorable toast. With a soft clink she pressed her glass against his but not before speaking up and adding onto his toast, “And to an amazing date and what will hopefully be an even better prom.” Finishing her words with a small sip from her glass she set it down on the blanket in front of her before reaching forward and grabbing one of the tiny sandwiches he had helped prepare for them. “Mm I’m sure this will only inflate your ego, but I think this date has officially beaten our last as my favorite. I don’t know… I guess I’m still surprised you went through all this just to ask me to prom,” she mused as she reached over for a brownie. Chewing on the chocolate dessert she could already see his lips curling up into that smug smirk she simultaneously loved and hated. The dates that he planned and surprised her with usually became her favorite and this one was certainly no different. “Even if your mom didn’t trust you around anything hot or sharp this food is so good,” she murmured taking another bite of the brownie and sighing softly as the chocolate melted against her taste buds. “Speaking of your mom your parents aren’t home?”

He smirked with pride at her comment, scooting a bit closer to her. “Oh?” Eli challenged, happy that he could impress her, even happier that she was admitting it. Remembering their last date that wasn’t one that involved homework sent a chill down his back, suddenly recalling their little session in the back of his dads car after an unexpected storm passed through, that was a day he’d probably never forget. He never wanted to. He swallowed the lump in his throat as he watched her bring the brownie to her lips, laughing a bit at her next set of words. “I’ll be sure to relay that message to Cece.” He assured, taking one for himself. He held a hand under his chin as he ate, catching crumbs as they fell and let his eyes meet hers again when she spoke, causing him to shake his head side to side, unable to speak with his mouth full. “They went out with a few of their friends, and Bullfrog left me with the car. It was a just a distraction, mostly. Considering we could have walked, but I didn’t want you guessing where we were going.” He explained further, shrugging his shoulders, finding it kind of excessive as he looked back on it, though it wasn’t like he could help him self. Once he had something in mind, he found it difficult to shake it, no matter how ridiculous. “I thought maybe a restaurant would suffice, but I figured you’d be expecting it.” Going on, Eli reached over to the seemingly empty basket, Eli shut the lid, and moved it behind him, outstretching his legs as he leaned back on his elbows. Gesturing for her to join him, he looked upward, seeing stars fill the dark sky, though their little spot was illuminated by the twinkling lights. Getting more comfortable, he moved his arms over his stomach, laying flat on his back, humming softly to the song in the background.

were you nervous at all about asking clare to prom?

Mon, 06 May 2013 12:22:18 -0400

Naturally, yes. I was a bit nervous.